HELLOOOO……..LOOOO…………LOOO……..loo……………lo…………HEYYYYY…………..
……..HEYYY…………………..Eyy……………ey………………ANYBODY OUT THERE…….
…….DY OUT THERE………………..OUT THere……………………….there………………….
…………….ere……………
…………….Man, this neighborhood sure is quiet this time of year!………….let’s seeeee, Greg said he was putting a sign on the front door of the BBR house…………….
…………….sort of a “beacon of hope” to wayward Bill’s fans………………
**********************************************************
***GIVE ME YOUR POOR, TIRED, HUDDLED BILL’S FANS****
********YEARNING FOR A NEW OWNER AND COACH********
****TEMPEST TOSSED FROM THE WRETCHED REFUSE*****
***********OF ANOTHER DISASTEROUS SEASON***********
**********************************************************
……….O.K. then,…….this MUST be the place!…….he said the key would be under the front mat………..OH LOOK,….it’s a friggin’ Dolphan’s Doormat…………………..excellent!, now I can “scrape the $*!+ right off my shoes”,……it sure was a long walk from Sweet Virginia!!! Boy, smearin’ muddy poop on the Dolphans never gets old for me.
……It sure was nice of the guy’s to let me hang out here!………………… Cool street to live on…….
with Patriarchal Shaw The Grand Pooba living next door………….Much respect!
…….I sure am going to miss the show this off season, but our beloved hosts are obviously going to be MUCH too busy! Good thing I caught up with them before they left……….
……..Cheery Greg could barely contain his excitement yesterday when I spoke to him. He said he finally got that job as manager of Bousch and Lombs new ROSE COLORED GLASSES DEPARTMENT. He assured me that his “team” would be able to manufacture enough pairs for all Bill’s Nation to use before next season!…………………I just hope the lenses are strong enough to handle the flash burn from “staring down the barrel” of a 5-11 season!……………………
………The good news is that we will have a burn specialist on hand next year!!!!! John told me he will be volunteering his every waking hour at the local hospital’s “skin peel tank” this off season………He mentioned something about trying to make amends and extend an olive branch to “burn nation” because of some “off color comments” he made!!!!!!!!!!!!!……
………..And noone will be busier than special agent Dave “Valkyrie” Drake. I believe he is really starting to gain Ralph “Pod Nazi” Wilson’s trust, and soon will be firmly entrenched in his coveted “Inner Circle”…………He mentioned something about getting Jim “Dooright” Kelly to help enlist special agent T.C.-VH1 to help with some elaborate electronics programming scheme……….
…….but more on that “thickening plot” later……………….
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
….Well now that I’m in these fancy new digs I better start decorating………………..let’s seeeee, I’m gonna have to put my “fandemonium” mural over here on this wall………..and I think I’ll use my new Sherman Williams “exclamation point paint” on all the trim………………..
…………….AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
…………Jim Kelly and Bruce Smith fatheads with green/white yard marker shag astro carpet………ever sooo limply spinkled with Juron’s red challenge flags…….and hard charging buffalos everywhere……………..perfect!
……..I can put my coveted freshly gold plated pre-chewed slim jim “e-mailer of the year” trophy right over here on my desk right next my laptop.
……..and my Jills blowup doll can sit on the couch next to my Juron Pincushion VooDoo doll………………….both should prove useful
…….No Bill’s pad would be complete without a Dan Dierdork Dartboard……….Just thinking of his bias commentary during Bill’s games makes me want to whip a dart at the bullseye
right now……..I think I will………….Ha! take that Danny…. and you can take your idiotic “crooked goalposts helping our 1990 super bowl team comments”,and shove them up your @$$ with a hepititis pre chewed slim jim!!!……You are no friend of Bill’s Nation!
……..Sorry to disappoint, and break ranks with the current Obama “love fest” going on in the country right now, but you can be assured that there won’t be any enemies of Bill’s Nation hanging around this place if I have anything to do with it………..the list “includes, but is not limited to”
– Joe or any other Jets fan
– Dickless or any other Dolphan
– PicklePuss or any other Patriots fan
– Anyone who utters the words “wide right”, “music city miracle”….etc.
***************GO AWAY YOU ARE NOT WELCOME HERE*******************
………..I can hang my signed Tasker jersey right here next to my “John’s Quote of the week” plaque…………….which reminds me, Julie Andrews suggested I hang a list of my other favorite things…………………
– My God and country
– My beloved hometown of Rochester
– My beautiful wife and 7 kids (all die hard Bills fans)
– My German Shepard “Titus” (as in avenue)
– My restored 1970 Electra Glide
– Programable Logical Controllers
– Rock A-Z with lots of “R” for Rolling Stones
– and of course BBR Podnation and all things Bill’s related
……….speaking of programming, special agent T.C.-VH1 took me shopping at the big Circuit City liquidation sale yesterday. We purchased many flat screens to hang around the house. He promised me “with his programming expertise” that this BBR hangout would broadcast nothing but Bill’s on a loop………65′,66′ championships…………the “electric company”……………Marv’s tutorial coaching videos…………..vintage 88-94 machine gun Kelly blowouts………..you know, nothing but the GOOD STUFF!
……….Wow , all this decorating sure has worked up an appetite in me……………let’s see what’s in the fridge………………Oh Yeah!.., Zwiegles hots and Wegman’s pop…………….and they packed the freezer with chocolate almond ice cream from Don and Bobs… Ahhhh,let me just stick my head in here and get that good ol’ January freezin’ Rochester feeling……….just a little lick…….AAHHHHH HEWP,!!!! MY PUNG IS THPUCK ON BA MEPAL GRAPE!!!!!!!!!!!……………..
………and all Podnation chants…………………..
……………Missin’ the Show, Wilson must Go!……………
Carpetbagger Dave
I am actually an alumnus of three different universities. All undergrad. All within four years after completing high school. That’s kinda strange, but does give me a few teams to root for.